Studies show1 that our brains react to attacks on our beliefs the same way as threats to our physical safety. That’s why any civil discussion can end up in violence when you run out of arguments. It’s difficult to admit that you might be wrong, especially when facing an opponent who embodies everything that you hate. Here, a personal example might prove helpful. When I’m about to lose my temper, I try to stop and remind myself that my momentary lapse in judgment and the physical violence that might ensue could be a sign of a bigger issue — that I got myself into an argument that I can’t win. Case in point: No Kill Movement’s article which states that “violence is such a useless option that only the incompetent would use it, and even they would use it as their last resort.” Its title comes from the first book in the Foundation series by an American writer Isaac Asimov (January 2, 1920–April 6, 1992). In Part III of the novel, Salvor Hardin asks Sef Sermak to read the framed statement hanging on the wall behind him:
[Physical] violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.
These wise words from the Foundation are also present on one of my all-time favorite wallpapers for my work computer, which I have to regularly sell and buy despite Wendell Berry’s advice to do otherwise. Complement with Marcus Aurelius on choosing compassion over competition and then revisit Kamalashila on how to practice lovingkindness meditation.